30025.) I want to get hurt. A car accident, anything. I want to get injured enough to wind up in a hospital, just to see if anyone would come to make sure I'm okay. And I'd pretend to be sleeping or dying so in case anyone actually did come, they would sit at the edge of my bed, crying, and tell me everything. I want to hear everything they've ever thought of me, how they really feel, if they're sorry for anything. I just want to know the truth. And I want to know who truly cares about me. Because if that happened to ANY one of my friends, I know I'd be the first person by their bedside. Why? Because I love them. And I'd do absolutely anything for each and every one of them. Too bad they'd never do the same for me.
Have you ever watched someone slowly die right infront of you ?
I just watched the Last Song and I’m crying. It was like last year all over again. Not the random love, but her father. Her father had cancer and he didn’t want anyone to know or make a big deal. That’ exactly what she did with me, and the rest of the family. I’m sitting here shaking because I can’t put myself to thing that she is gone. Now, it will be a year next month from when I first found out. I don’t know what to say, to do, to think. I’m just sitting here crying on my bed because of a stupid movie that I didn’t know would bring back all of these feelings. My head hurts and I have to go out in an hour.
I can’t help but to just sit here and mess up my makeup.